It can happen to you!

[Losttoo]

A psychiatrist visited a California mental institution and asked a patient, "How did you get here? What was the nature of your illness?" He got the following reply.

"Well, it all started when I got married and I guess I should never have done it. I married a widow with a grown daughter who then became my stepdaughter.

My dad came to visit us, fell in love with my lovely stepdaughter, then married her. And so my stepdaughter was now my stepmother. Soon, my wife had a son who was, of course, my daddy's brother-in-law since he is the half-brother of my stepdaughter, who is now, of course, my daddy's wife.

So, as I told you, when my stepdaughter married my daddy, she was at once my stepmother! Now, since my new son is brother to my stepmother, he also became my uncle. As you know, my wife is my step-grandmother since she is my stepmother's mother. Don't forget that my stepmother is my stepdaughter. Remember, too, that I am my wife's grandson.

But hold on just a few minutes more. You see, since I'm married to my step-grandmother, I am not only the wife's grandson and her hubby, but I am also my own grandfather. Now can you understand how I got put in this place?"

After staring blanky with a dizzy look on his face, the psychiatrist replied: "Move over!"
 

Have a GR8 day,,
Losttoo

[Manta]

Makes the eyes water just thinking about it.

A father walks into a restaurant with his young son..

 He gives the young boy three 10p coins to play with to keep him occupied.

 

 Suddenly, the boy starts choking and going blue in the face....

  The father realises the boy has swallowed the coins and starts slapping him on the back..

 

 The boy coughs up 2 of the 10p's but is still choking.

 Looking at his son, the father is panicking, shouting for help.

 

 A well dressed, attractive, and serious looking woman, in a blue business suit is sitting at a coffee bar reading a newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee.

At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her coffee cup down, neatly folds the newspaper, places it on the counter, gets up from her seat and makes her way, unhurried, across the restaurant.

 

 Reaching the boy, the woman carefully pulls down his pants; takes hold of the boy's' testicles and starts to squeeze and twist, gently at first and then ever so firmly.. tighter and tighter !!!

After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and

  coughs up the last of the 10p's, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand.

 

 Releasing the boy's testicles, the woman hands the coin to the father and walks back to her seat at the coffee bar without saying a word.

 

 As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no ill effects, the father rushes over to the woman and starts thanking her saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that before, it was fantastic. Are you a doctor? "

 

 

 'No,' the woman replied.

I'm with the Inland Revenue..'

[Bob]

LOL now that I'ed believe !
HAHAHAH
Bob...

[Manta]

A U.S. Navy Admiral was attending a naval conference that included
> Admirals from the U.S. , English, Canadian, Australian and French
> Navies. At a cocktail reception, he found himself standing with a
> large group of Officers that included personnel from most of those
> countries. Everyone was chatting away in English as they sipped
> their drinks but a French admiral suddenly complained that, whereas
> Europeans learn many languages, Americans learn only English.' He
> then asked, 'Why is it that we always have to speak English in these
> conferences rather than speaking French?' Without hesitating, the
> American Admiral replied 'Maybe it's because the Brits, Canadians,
> Aussies and Americans arranged it so you wouldn't have to speak
> German.'


Manta

[Manta]

Don't know if this will work ,  but here goes.

no it didn't.

Manta

[Cowboy]

Oddly enough Manta, that made me chuckle. 

[Manta]

As long as it doesn't keep you awake at night wondering what it was that didn't work.

Manta

[Jake]

made me chuckle too. its been forever and a day since I've been on the forum and I go straight to the funnies