Mom's battle.

[Bob]

I've moved the Posts from the Randy cell thred to here of my Moms battle for life.
as it just seams wrong to me to clutter up Randys' thred <GRIN>
so I'll try to chop it all out and see what I come up with and we can get back to discussing the Randy cell back on the other one ! HAHAHAHAHA
...
Bob.

  I just got word that My Mom had a car accident last night and spent about 8hrs unconsious in the cold car on the side of the road before someone found her, she is in the hospital in the shock/trama ICU in Redding, so soon as the wife gets home with the car I'll run in and see whats what !
 sounds like she'll be ok, has a few cracked ribs and a bit bumped up, but I'm thinking that she might have had a stroke , thats why the accident in the first place,sounds like the doctors suspect that.... she's a good driver  and its definately not like her to drive off the road...something happened to cause it. so looks like I'll be fixing her car...
if its fixable, doesn't sound like it ! but no one knows where its at !<GRIN>
I'll call the Highway patrol and find out who towed it....they'll know.
...
sounds like Granny had a rough night.... and she certainly doesn't deserve that !
...
so my pressence here might be limited in the near future for a bit... but I'll still be here every day !
...
Bob........

[hydrotinkerer]

Bob,
Sorry to hear about your mom hope she is ok. Hope everything works out for you.

[randy]

That's sad to hear; hope she's all right.

[Manta]

Same goes for me.  I had a minor stroke a couple of years back.  Not nice at all.

Manta

[Bob]

Well,she is still Kickin' but not real strongly thats one beat up grandma !
the car is totaled, no doubt about that... I almost got in a fight with the fellas at the police impound yard I walked in and was looking at the car and these 2 guys about had a fit whe they discovered me .... biligerant as all heck and that pissed me off  I told him if you ask me nicely I'll leave other wise we're going to have problems you and I !
 and in the next 500 words he did say please so I turned around and left ... JERKS!
.... I've never been to a police impound yard before in my life and I'm supposed to KNOW that there is no tresspassing ? the gate was wide open and I saw no signs ( evedently covered by the open gate) .... but I sware you'ed think I was sneeking around steeling dope out of a wrecked car or something ! ...
Oh well, anyway Granny is ...I guess fair, I think she'll survive ok as long as the doctors don't Kill her with their medication....but she's in allot of pain from her back and very grogy from the head injury... My sister said she is allot better from yesterday though
she was concerned about her puppie dogs and I asured her their taken care of...
the doc finally gave her some tylnial or how ever you spell it non asprin asprin anyway...
and I am sure that will help ease the back pain... she is one tore up o'l gal bruses and cuts all over her, but the big worry is the head cuncushon , and if she can make it a week or so then she should be out of the woods.... however they did find that she has masive cancer in one lung and they figure she just ran out of oxygen and passed out while driveing
... the one doc told my sister that she probly had 6 months without an operation...
so thats not good at all... but first things first is getting her working on all thrusters again , she looked like she was realy doped up and I asked the nurse there and he said no thats frm the sub durmal hematoma and I said what is that exactly ? he said a bad concussion and some bleeding in the brain.  I said Oh well that I understand !
she is so very frail that the doctors are cautious about doing anythng... and I think that is great !  I think in a few days she'll be grabbing me by the shirt collar and saying get me the "blankety blank " Outa here ! 
 I know that the tylanoal er what ever it is will help allot because that is what she took for her back pain at home... and that impact in the car must have realy wrenched her back bad....  I hate to see her in pain, but as the Doc explained  they can't risk any pain killers because she is alergic to Codine, bee stings and who knows what else !
and the last thing she needs is an alergic reaction... and I agreed completely and told mom "Tough it Out!"  and I know she can do it, if she can get her brain working right again
hell she's the one that taught me how to control pain , I know she can do it... but it ain't easy when you havn't had to do it in a long time !...
so I think she's getting better... time will tell... then we can set a date for the Lung surgery.... I am sure she will look foward to that <GRIN> about as much as I would I am sure.... and I'ed have to be stareing death in the eye before I'ed go in ... so I bet she'll like that idea !
....
  I saw that twinkel in her eye though when she reconized me , I am thankfull for that !
no body should have to go through that kind of pain... I talked to the nurse for a long time about her back , that it should have been fuzed years ago, and that when its real bad she wares a back brace... and they didn't know that... I said she is in pain can't you give her something to ease the pain ?  and they finally desided to give her tylinol, through the IV I guess, she has more wires and tubes comeing off her than my Toyota truck !
Hopefully she'll get a good nights rest tonight  and be feeling better tomorrow!
...
anyway,  hell of a new years present to a very sweet O'l gal... but I guess ya gott'a roll with the punches, even when your 78 yrs old and only weigh 98lbs !
....
I'll let ya know what I find out tomorrow.
...
thanks for the well wishes guys,  right now she needs all the help she can get !
...
catcha later
Bob........

[janmarsh]

Must be a great relief to you Bob. What an experience for the little Lady !

Regards to you all,  Marshall.

[Bob]

That she's Alive Yes definately ! that she is in bad pain No... but I can't do anything about that I guess, just be there I suppose...
Mom and I are close, and I know its coming some day, but I don't have to like it !<grin>
.... I asked her if she knew what happened and she said Nooo... so I said "I bet you were driving along and all of a sudden you find yourself in the hospital uh ?"
she said yah ! ... that was about all I got from her, still mighty groggy...I told her what we think happened and all that ( heck, we still don't know!)
but I've been in the hospital wondering what the world happened and it is good to know ...even if its beside the point, the brain wants to know ! so it will never make that mistake again ! HEHEHEHEHEHE
....
actually she is in worse shape than I thought she was... but I think she'll pull through if the doctors don't screw up !... all it would take is one idiot give her codine for the pain and its all over....sense she is deathly alergic to it...
...Thankfully, my sister is making arrangements to stay up here for a month....
or I would have to move in with mom to take care of her, but Sis is going to do that for now... which takes a big load off my mind ! ... if I can get my pickup truck out from the snow bank I will drive it down and let my sister have it while she is here so she has transportation, ( she came up on the bus to visit and finds mom in the hospital after she called to have mom come pick her up... I bet she fills like heck about that!)
but I have about 1 and 3/4 feet of snow with about 4" frozen on the surface... I can walk on it easy without breaking through ! and about 75 feet of distance to dig out to get the truck free from its icy tomb... and no snow chains ! HAHAHAHAH
... so I'm lible to be huffing and puffing allot around here in the next few days
... I did get my garden tractor going but no way can it move in that stuff... with me on it it breaks through and the rear wheels just spin....... so its just to deep to mash down
...I was hopeing but no such luck ! hehehehehhe
...
Bob.......

[Jake]

just read about your mom. sorry to hear about it. good idea to have someone stay with her cause sometimes ya really gotta watch them doctors. sounds like she'll pull through and we'll keep her in our prayers

[Bob]

Please DO Jake , she needs all the help she can get right now and I know from experience God does answer Prayers, perhaps not how you intend but he does answer! with enough people out there pulling fer her I know she'll pull through ...Thanks !
Bob.......

[scratch1676]

just be there for her when needed and cherish the time you have with her.  There is no one sweeter or closer to heart than my mother and I hate to hear this about yours.

[Painless]

Bob, just read about your mom. With you guys around her I'm sure she will pull through. Still, she will be in my prayers too. Hang in there!

[xxsimon]

Bob been reading and waiting for people’s replies all day like always 
This forum is the first and last place I go
Thought of writing a full page and half but decided (bob does that best) and…
I cheat I use a spell check
Bob I am thinking of you and your mom and hope all is well soon.
                                         
                                                      simon

[Tink]

Bob,
I was out splitting fire wood all day yester and today. Just  logged in and am so sorry to hear about your mom. She'll pull through. My mom is a tough old girl too and also suffered a stroke recently. She is doing alright for an 84 year old. Your's will be OK too. If you have any doubt about the doc who is looking after her get another one. Don't be shy about that. You both are in my prayers.
Tink

[Bob]

Well, today she's not looking good at all, doc says if she don't eat she'll die... so I told her that  I dunno if she hurd me or not as her eyes were classy and obviously suffering badly
I asked if they had given her anything for the pain and they said NO... so I insisted on them giveing her something and explained about her bad back... the nurse cam in and gave her some tylinol again in some apple sause and she got it down... when I left she was sleeping much better without the moaning and groaning that she was doing when I arrived.
... if she doesn't give up she'll make it, but if she gives up she won't make the night.
in all honnesty I doubt I'ed want to live with all that pain myself...and yet the nurses seam oblivious to it... I guess you have to shield yourself from it or it would eat you alive...
Man it hurts to see her suffer... even if it kills her, at least they should alieviate the pain, thats not fair at all !...
...
everone dies eventually and if it's her time then so be it, but she can do without the suffering ! thats down right mean.
...
I guess tonight will tell if she will make it or not, they took her  out of trama ICU to just down the hall , but the nurse said its just a matter of time and I said "she wants to live she told me so yesterday and his eyes widened I said she's a tough o'l bird but her back pain is wareing her down... .. shortly there after is when he gave her some tylinal
... so maybe, just maybe they will calm her pain down enough so she can get ahold again
other wize she'll just give up.... I certainly would !
... so, shall see
...
I'll delete all these posts about my mom later, and let this thred get back to the "Randy Cell" where it belongs, in a few days.
....
Bob.......

[ROADKING]

MY PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU.

[Jake]

hey Bob what's the word on your mom today?

[Bob]

Howdy Jake !
Well so far so good I guess !
she's looking a bit better, colors back in her face more like it should be,
and she doesn't seam to be laboring so much to breathe so the pain must be letting up a bit
the Doc I think put her on an I.V. for the tylinol, but I'm not sure
I asked the nurse and she said she was given some tylinol and just gave her some more when I was there...but I think its by I.V. as her chock board by the end of her bed says NBM ( nothing by mouth) they are pumping her so full of fluids its un real ! and they said her lungs were collecting fluid ...well DUH ! ...
but I hope to heck they know what their doing... she was asleep when I got there today and I didn't want to disturb her, came back later and the nurse had just moved her and the nurse said "she doesn't like me" because every time I come in here I have to move her, and I said You wouldn't like that eather if your back was hurting like hers does!, she said yes but she can't stay in the same position all the time, she has to move... ( which is correct to prevent bed sores.) ... so soon as the nurse gets done moving her mom moves her self back... <GRIN> and the nurse said well, she is getting better because she is moving her self !.... Mom was glareing at the nurse all the time she was there...
 My Sisters Daughter said she cept trying to get out of bed this morning and was talking a bit this morning... so almost holding a conversation... which sounds very promiceing
she drifted back to sleep within minutes after the nurse left her alone and so we left, I had to go to her house and fix the heater for my sister... so they wouldn't be cold!
....
Not out of the woods by any means but I think she's doing better ! tomorrow is 72hrs after the accident and it usually takes that long for the brain to get back to normal size after a bad bump like that so she should be doing better hopefully
...when the swelling goes down on the brain she should have more of her o'l spark back
still fairly glassy eyed... but I guess thats to be expected.
no skull fractures, but my Mom is a hard head ! HAHAHAHA!
at least shes not suffering as bad today and that makes me feel allot better !
still no frigging picknic by any means in and out of conciousness seams like , but still fighting....
time will tell I guess !
...
Bob......

[Jake]

if the pain is lettin up the Good Lord must have heard a few of our prayers. He knows when her time is up and if it isn't now at least He's takin some of the pain away. the whole thing still sucks though. seems like just when things are goin good somethin like this has to happen

[Bob]

Well Jake...
 if there was no adversities in life at all, and everything was rosey all the time,
your view of a good time would drastically change, every time some thing Moderately good happened to ya you'ed think Ahhh man why me ? what did I do to deserve this ?...
so its all relitive... just depends on your outlook from what side of the fence you care to look from...
 in some ways this whole incident is totally bad, but depending on your outlook it could be a good thing, perhaps if the accident didn't happen My mother could have been driveing to town and caused a school bus full of kids to crash and burn killing all, something that would be far worse in her book and in mine to have happen, especially when being the responcable person for such a tragic event.
All of life is Relitive and depends upon your outlook, if you say today is a bad day then you must be compairing it to other days that wern't so bad.... and then the question arrizes , why were they not so bad ?
 When you are in control of your mind and feelings, you then have control of weather you have a good day or a bad day...
... now this sounds simple but it is anything but simple ! its a great deal harder to control your own emotions and say I'm not going to be sad today than it sounds...but it can be done. and usually its with vering degrees of success, but how well you can accomplish the task depends directly upon how much practice you've had !
 I believe the Bible is a good book and has allot of good teachings in it but not ALL that we should learn, way too much was left out so many years ago. trials and tribulations will go on for ever as long as you live, because they are a part of life, not something out side of life that jumps in and effects you every once in a while but a part of life just as your body is. Dealing with adversities is not easy, no one ever said it was, but it becomes much easier when you step back and look at it from other prospectives, just as you would when your designing a cell that should work but just doesn't have the output you think it should have.... you step back and examen everything,  and look at it from another point of view
and some how it becomes clearer, better  if I dare use that word... perhaps just a bit more tolerable.
 I have no idea why the powers that be would see fit to allow something like this to happen
but that does not mean its not for a good cause. as bad as it might seam now.
but I just as easily could say No god in his right mind would do this to a sweet O'l gal
there is nothing that could ever justify the pain and anguish I have seen in her eyes.
but that is simply just 2 sides of the fence... neither view is totally correct.
its better by far to adopt the outlook of what will be will be, and try to form the circumstances to the best outcome you can. not give in to the inevitable, but strive for a better outcome if at all possible. if all of your efforts come to not, then at least you tried, where if you just sat there with your head in your hands and waited for the inevitable, the inevitable will find you sooner or later,and you have nothing to say for yourself then... where if you at least try to change the circumstances there is a chance that it could change !
 Every Adversity in life is like that, you can take it by the horns and wrastle it into submission or lay down and let it walk all over you.... and strangely enough if you do that... lay down and let it walk all over you , its almost as if its 5 times as bad, as if the lesson is really being driven home hard.... like " ooh your going to take it then uh ? ok well, here's some more , how do you like that ?... Life is trying to MAKE you stronger!
and if you don't stand and fight, it will take you by storm,
...
thats how I see it anyway.... how did I get on this soap box anyway ?
hehehehehehehhe
...
Bob......

[Tink]

Bob,
As you can see i got into this thread. I couldn't from the email though. No problem. I'm glad your mom is looking better. It is amazing how much pain we can stand and not remember it afterwards. Always remember our God is  loving God but we are still bound by our physical boddies. No matter how much it hurts he will make us feel better afterwards. This is part of the 'Tempering of the Soul'. It is how we get strong. And who is to say what the other person's threshhold of pain is. I wish her and you the best.
Tink

[charley]

Bob,

I just saw this.  My thoughts are with you and your mom.

Charley

[Bob]

Thanks to all of you !
and Yah I see you found it Tink !... sorry for the screwup... but Feral fixed it !<GRIN>
that girl can do anything ! ....good thing as most of this stuff is greek to me...
its so diferent from my Basic and C programming days that its a completely diferent world !
....
anyway... progress report on Mom.
 Sis said she was allot more responsive today, looking a bit better,breathing better, and Sis was even talking to her this morning... and she told Sis  when sis asked if she was in pain Mom said "NO"
although her responces are more or less restricted to yes and no and Ahhhhh... I think she is comeing out of it... finally... Sis showed her the stuffed doggy a neighbor gave her and that got the Ahhh out of her hehehehhe... so there is someone home in there.... and I am soooooo happy to see that...
dunno how much yet, but I have a feeling she'll be as good as new in a month or so...
looking better, but still in very serious condition....
 See guys... God does answer prayer.
but its far from over at this point.... its my view that she just needs a fighting chance, and she'll make it....but things are looking better.
....
thanks for the help my friends !<GRIN>
...
Bob.......

 

[Tink]

Geat! I'm glad to hear she is doing better.

[Jake]

sorry for the downcast post. didn't mean it to sound that way. I'm in agreement about the adversity thing. good days and bad days do seem to be relative to what we've experienced so the bad ones are needed to appreciate the good ones and with the right mind set virtually none can seem bad. your right about that too. it is very hard to control emotions. ya can tell yourself your not mad all day but it won't do a bit of good. somehow though when ya really decide to (and with Gods help) your mood about somethin or someone can change. I guess that part of growin up spiritually is gettin ahold of this stuff  

[Bob]

No Problem Jake ! I knew what ya ment <GRIN> even if I went off on a tangent ! hehehehe
 One thing I do know well, is myself...  and it takes knowing why you feel the way you do in order to get a hold of yourself some times....
 A long time ago... ( yah here comes another story!)heheheh I had an unreasonable fear of crowds...
but I really didn't call it a fear of crowds, it was more of a disdain or hatred of them .
and one time when the wife Kid and I were in the mall shopping close to christmass time I almost came unglued.... and that told me  something was wrong with me... and being an inquisitive sort I wanted to know why and what it was.... I picked up the book called "Dianetics" by L.Ron Hubbard, and read it cover to cover ... something odd for me as the only thing I read up to that time was manuals! but it was extreamily interesting and so I re read and re read the thing till I figured out what he was doing.
and one night when trying to think about what it could possably be in my past that would have made me react so badly in crowds, the memory of my child hood popped into my head of when I was lost at christmass time in a big department store in Los angles CA.... I wasn't just scared, I was terrified!
and running for all I was worth trying to find my Momm'a !  and all I could see was legs and hands reaching out trying to grab me, as I darted back and forth trying to excape those "STRANGERS!"....
and it hit me.... that was it... that was the cause of my unreasonable reaction to crowds !
and indeed it was ! I burst out laughing,  to think something so long ago and so trivial now could have effected me so much and I didn't know what it was because it was locked deep in my mind and I could not dredge up that incident I didn't remember that happening before at all, Mom mentined it a few times in passing but it seamed like , yah sure mom... what ever... wasn't that big a thing to me or I'ed remember it right ? ... but she asured me it was a big thing at the time...
well when I saw Mom again I asked her about it, and she explained the store, what it looked like and everything... and I remembered it then.... after the lock was released I could access that part of my memory once again, and that scared kid was still in there !...
I was about 40 or 45 when I made that discovery and over time I have gotten to the point that large crowds are a bother but not something I go berzirk over...
however, every once in a while it will creep up on me and supprize me, and I have to remember that it was just because I was lost in a store as a kid and that fear usually goes away almost immediately...
but... I'll keep my paranoia ...thank you very much !<grin> as I feel its better to be safe than sorry!
but the un reasonable fear is now gone.... because I know that little part ... the piece of the puzzel
that makes me what I am today.
 so I'm no longer a ticking time bomb waiting to go off on some unsuspecting crowd of people ...like I was. and I attribute that to "Dianetics" .
Now I know I still have allot to learn about myself, for instance why do I Want so desperately to be AWAY from others , out in the boonies as I have been most of my life, I like people, on one hand but hate them on the other, and to me that doesn't make any sense at all.... so I still have allot of work to do...
...no rest for the wicked I guess ! HAHAHAHAHA
...
I have discovered However that you can control your emotions... its not easy but it does become easier with practice, and more practice means you get better at it....
 the problem is Most of us never even try to control our emotions, we simply react... the cause and effect routine is the flavor of the day as far as emotions are concerned for almost everyone.
This is normal.... if you flip someone off they get mad... cause and effect... however you can derail that emotion before it takes effect....  someone flips me off and I burst out laughing !( usually)
and all that does is make them madder hehehehe...
this happens with me because I have tried to contition myself to not let anyone spoil my day...after all... why should I allow someone else to dictate what kind of day I am to have when they are a nasty person to begin with ?  its Phitttt ! and "shine them on"
no doubt that I am not so far along that I can say I can do this 100% of the time, infact I am lucky if I gcan accomplish it 25% of the time in all honnesty... but you have to THINK IT in order to stop your own reactions... a reaction of jumping back when you see a Rattlesnake is a good reaction,  but getting mad because there is a car infront of you slowing you down is not a good reaction....
why do you react like that ? have you ever thought about it ? most havn't ...as I said most people just React.... but you can change your reactions to something favorable... just like when you were a kid and started swaring and your mom told you not to do that, so you changed "goddammit" to "goshdarnit" or "Crap" to "Carrots!" a poor example, but it amounts to the same thing...
instead of Road rage and driving the guy off the side of the road and beating him up because he pulled out in front of you, you can very politely smile and wave to him.... and he will be so confuzed he'll have to park and walk ! heheheheheh 99.9% of the time they know they screwed up and are sorry for it anyway...you don't have to do or say anything...they already know!
...I know when I goof up and do something like that I feel like heck for a long time and I should!
because I endangered everyones lives for what ? being impatient ? thats a real good reason to kill people !
....
anyway....Controling your own emotions is not easy but it is essiential to being happy in my view.
feeling depressed ?  Look in the mirror and laugh at yourself, and think of how funny that must look to anyone that sees it !.... bound to bring a smile to your face even on the worst of days ! HAHAHA!
...
Bob...

[Jake]

A good example:  Matthew 5-44 says love your enemies. is there a harder command or more difficult challenge anywhere in this world? If so I haven't seen it. with the exception of getting a car to run on hho maybe   

[Bob]

Yah you got that right Jake !
...
Well today is good news ! Mom was awake and talking and doing so much better its realy suppriseing!
she has control of both arms and can point 2 fingers and when I told her about don't worry about the car as the insurance co. will take care of it she said "NO Comment" and I laughed, and said you mean you don't wann'a drive it again ? and she just looked at me <grin> and I said good ! but sis will need it for transportation while she stays at your place getting you back on your feet again , and she said "yah thats true!"...
  She wants out of that hospital so bad ... and I told her sense she is getting better  it won't be so long now and she'll be able to go home... and she said "thats good !" I said Your tough Mom ! you can do it ... put up with the torture a bit longer, get well and you can go home ! she said OK.... I'll obey the rules!... and I had to laugh and she smiled !
... the change from yesterday to today was almost like a different person ! so much better....
but they had her hands tied down so she couldn't mess with the tubes in her nose... and I told her that she had more tubes in her than my toyota pickup has and she laughed ! and shook her head yes !
... so she's still in there, and boy am I glad to see that !  what a load off my mind...
I'll sleep good tonight  thats for sure !
Keep her in your prayers as she ain't out'a the woods yet, but she is showing signs of getting better now that they are feeding her !.... looks to me like she'll make it now ... but we shall see in time!
....

thanks for all the help ! and thank you Lord !
Bob.......

[Jake]

thats awesome! Don't be surprised to see a full recovery. At this point it sounds obvious that the Lord had His hand in the mess to pull her out of it and if thats the case I bet He ain't done yet.

[Bob]

hehehe By golly I do believe your right, strange to hear that coming from someone other than my self  though !  but you definitely have the picture!
... Many times I have seen things turn around just, to get your hopes up, only to be dashed apart on the rocks... "its not over till the fat lady sings" I guess! and I don't mean this to be disrespectful of any thing or any body and especially of the good Lord... but he has other things in mind some times. and I'ed trust His plan any day over mine. because I know deep in my hart its better in the long run.
... this life is MEAN... when I was growing up I thought all I had to do was get to 18yrs old and everything would be Rosey!... when I reached 21 I thought maybe 35 yrs old and I'ed be old enough to "know better"....and smart enough not too ! and then perhaps things would get better...
I'm 57 now and its still not easy... and know now it never will be... because its not supposed to be.
but we can try to make things better for others....and in those times when you do make a difference in the lives of others, seams to make it worth all the hardship.
...
 I'm a bit Psychic and new something was coming up for about 4 months... I don't know how I knew but
I had a feeling that I couldn't shake...  and I know know that my Moms accident was it.  I tried my darndest to get moved to her ranch before the snow flew up here but every time I would try, something else would happen to slow down the works... although I did accomplish moving 80% of my stuff to the ranch I am still, way up here in the snow and cold when "I KNOW I should be down there at the ranch!"
...but perhaps that is also better, I don't know... this incident has brought my sister and I closer togather than we have been in years... and that in and of itself is a good thing indeed.
...
I can't help but wonder what will have transpired in my life 1 year from now <GRIN>
...
it sure was good to see that Smile on her face though ! hehehe
I'll see Mom again tomorrow and keep ya informed !
...
I don't remember if I mentioned it or not but the car insurance people said they would take care of the car , and the Hospital people said the car insurance is covering everything so not to worry!...
not only was I SUPPRIZED at hearing that but really relieved too ! at $40.00 a day storage fee for the car, and they will not move it till the $500+ tow bill is paid, I figured they would wind up putting a lean on Mom's house , because I simply don't have that kind of money, and neither does my Sister.
so needless to say that was a big relief to the both of us !
.... I'm sure glad not everyone is like those people at Shasta Towing... <GRIN>
...
As we get Older we tend to think that everyone but just a special few are Nasty SOB's and that not realy true...its like calling every black person a Nigger and so on... being Jaded as I used to call it in the 1970's is very easy to aquire as you get older.... but don't do it guys ! there is still alot of good people out there... yes 90% of them want to seperate you from your money, but thats besides the point... HAHAHAHAHAHA try to over look that !
...
Bob........

[Tink]

Bob,
Very glad to hear your mom is doing so much better. I had to hide my mom's car keys when she was 82 and that was tramatic to say the least. Your mom sounds a lot like mine. It would have taken an incident like yours to get my mom to give up those keys on her own. My biggest fear was that she would get in the car and not be able to get out! We're lucky to have them in our lives.
Tink

[randy]

Good to hear she's doing better, I hope she's back to 100% in short order, cherish family while you can cause ya just never know, I learned that one the hard way losing family members in my lifetime, my prayers are with ya.

[charley]

Glad to hear things are going a lot better.  Sounds like your mom is one tough bird and I hope you get her home soon.

Charley

[Bob]

Well, Today, was back to the same o'l same ol... not doing very good at all, but she did try to talk to me,and then seamed dispondant, I think is the word..."not working on all thrusters" so to speak...
Unfortionately I think I understood what she said, and that was "I don't want to live like this".
but I guess she needs a cheering section or something, tomorrow I will go spend more time down there
as today it looked like she just needed to sleep... in all honnesty she's probly depressed! I think I would be in that condition.
...
at this stage I don't know if she's all in there or not, I think so but its so hard to tell.
not that it realy matters I suppose, I still love her, and hate to see her suffering ... and suffering to her is just being in the hospital...
they did have the restraints off her today so she must be doing as Sis and I told her... talk to the nurses, respond to them "don't ignore them" ( thats what she was doing, I'm sure of it!)
(she is a hard head ! and stubbern as the day is long ! )
so hopefully she'll snap out of it and be better tomorrow....they even had her standing up yesterday
so she was probably just pooped ! no solid food at all and just that liquid stuff, I don't amagon that will go very far in the energy department....
....
up and down, up and down... she doesn't seam to be very stable that I have to admit...
and with all the tubes and stuff in her, its very hard for her to talk, so its realy hard to tell whats going on....  I'll talk to her tomorrow if she's responsive enough for that and find out what she wants
... if thats "fooie on the hospital take me home !".... thats going to be tough ! she has that right if she has the brain working correctly, but how the heck do you tell !
...
 I've alwayse said that if I was in such a siduation UN plug my butt ! I don't want to live under those conditions.... if its perminant, but thats the thing, its probly NOT perminant at all !  I think she needs to be told this so she can get back to healing up ! laying there in bed for a week she probly came up with her own conclusions... and I don't think anyone is realy talking to her telling her what is going on or what the problem is... Guess I better check in to that.
...
anyway, she's still Kicking... don't think she's happy about it today, but never the less thats the case!.
...Bob...

[IronBear]

Bob, Sorry to hear about your Mom.
I shall think good thoughts for her and your family.

IronBear

[Bob]

Thanks Ironbear thats appreciated a bunch !
Allot of people do not understand that "GOOD THOUGHTS" and "Good Wishes" are very similar if not the same as Prayer. although the one has a religious connotation, and the other one doesn't the Idea is almost the same. 
 I believe that we ourselves have abilities that we do not even know about, we can effect things just by thinking about it, and that has been scientifically proven, not just once but many times through the last few decades...In all truthfullness "Laying the problem in Gods' Hands" may be Scripturally correct, and it is far easier to do it that way, but to me, its like paying the church to prey for you.. so you don't go to hell.... Do it yourself !  If you have the ability and don't, THEN its your problem <grin>
Luckily the good Lord took care of that ages ago, and we have no real worry, you just have to battle within yourself as to why you don't do what you know you should do !
 I was raised in a Strictly Religious House in my child hood,and that stayed with me till I was about 24yrs old when I realized that the "Religion" I was following was a long way away from the truth...
the words may well be the same but the Actions of the people are what count. So I stopped going to church and tried to live my life the best way I know how, and be an example of what a good person SHOULD be.... But as always is the case we fall short of our goals, and tend to laps back into the "Old ways", only constant vigilance can keep your feet on the right path...and I don't think any man on earth can do that... but we SHOULD TRY !
...
Now for an update on Mom...
 I saw her again today, but she was sleeping woke up for a second and then went back to sleep, so I hunted down her nurse and talked with her for a while and she explained that they are doing alot of work in the early morning and wearing her out ! <GRIN> and I didn't know that, she said she doesn't talk much but will answer yes and no questions with no problems,and doesn't hesitate at all to tell the nurse she doesn't want to do that hehehehhehe I said thats good and the nurse agreed.
 She doesn't seam to be in pain at all anymore which is good, but sense the brain is still trying to heal up she sleeps a great deal of the time, I told the nurse that I think Mom told me that she "didn't want to live like this", but I'm not really sure if that is what she said...but I think so. and she said well, I think she is mostly just "Pissed off" from being here. and I had to laugh because that is what mom would actually say ! but its too early in the game to give up, she is showing signs of getting better every day, she is stable now where she wasn't before, so that is good...
 Recovery will be slow... that was a hard bump on the head, but she should come out of it in time.
if she gives up she'll just vegetate, if she keeps trying she'll get better...slowly.
all in all it doesn't sound like much fun for her, but then, I don't suppose it would !<grin>
...the Nurses concern is her breathing... she is on Oxygen and has been sense the start, and at 100% at that( through the nose feeder) and sense that one lung is so messed up she is watching her breathing real close!. I'm going to have to talk to Mom and see if she wants the Lung Operation... and I am not looking forward to that at all... I already Know what she will say.... "NO WAY!" but I want to hear it from her.
...
in the words of My generation "Keep sending those GOOD Vibes People!" she is getting better !
and those of you that Prey Please continue !
Your help is appreciated and Indeed....NEEDED!
....
Bob.......

[wess]

Sorry to hear about your Mom & everything Bob. I've been off the computer for awhile & just checked today & saw this about your Mom. I dont know what it is but it sure seems like winter is the worst time for family. I lost my Mom, Dad, Grandparents, and a very good friend all in winter time. Seems like the end of Dec. till Feb is the worst time for me. I will pray for your Mom & that Gods will be done. I read your posts & thought that what you said sounded alot like me. I too am afraid of crowds & kinda keep to myself & it was from childhood. I remember my first day of school & hiding behind my Moms skirt..lol. So I know what you mean. Its amazing how much influence Moms have on us & especially the pre-teen yrs. So its no wonder we cherish our Moms like we do. I truely hope everything works out for her & you for the best & like I said will pray for her...Wes

[Bob]

Thanks Wess !
Much appreciated !
...
Bob......
...
HEHEHE Just reading my reply and the saying I have at the bottom and it even is true in this case...
its just a little bit harder Mom...thats all ! <GRIN>
...
every time I'd tell here "Ahh Mom !, thats imposable ! she'd always say "Son, the imposable is only a little bit harder"....  Now the shoe is on the other foot and its time for her to practice what she preached.... although none of my tasks were near as hard as hers is now,  I have learned she was right!
....strange how things work out that way <GRIN>
but time will tell !
...
Bob...

[Painless]

Bob,

Been busy for a few days, but its good to come back and see that your mom is on the road to recovery. State of mind is everything with healing, both for the patient and family. This is all part of the good lords plan I'm sure, you already mentioned the changes with you and your sis so that's proof.

God bless your mom and all who care for her.

Russ.

[abe]

Bob    Sorry to hear about your mom. I never know what to say at times like this.But I'm glad to hear she's getting better now. I lost my mom last year and my dad a couple of years ago,so I know how it feels to see them in pain,It hurts you too. I'm glad to see you turned to GOD for strength. He has never let me down. Sounds like there's a lot of good people on this site too. We'll keep y'all in our prayer 
                                                                             chris

[Bob]

Well as I said before up and down , up and down, but this day was really down !
struggling to breathe again and very glassy eyed.... I know the look all to well from having to put cats out of their misery and believe me when I say that if it was up to me I would put her out of her misery now. when I see a cat like that they have a day or two at the most and those 2 days are hell for them.
However its not up to me, so I can't help in that regard. but I think the good lord will take that step for me very soon. as I will be very supprized if she makes the night.
 the problem is she has Phnenuma now bad, and with only one working lung she is not getting much oxygen
into her blood at all, the new doctor ( my sis switched doctors<grin>) found that her white blood count was way way up, it spiked this morning at 35 when normal is 5....so she is fighting an infection, more than likely the Pneumonia .
....
thanks for all the well wishes and Prayre ... she needs all the help all can muster!
So I'm kind'a sitting here waiting for that inevitable phone call now, because after talking to the doctor this morning.... there is very little chance at all that she will pull through it now.
... Perhaps its best that way, I know my mother enough to know she wouldn't want to live being bed ridden....
...but it ain't over yet.
...
Bob.......

[Manta]

Bob,

I lost my parents some years ago. So I know how it is.
I really do feel your pain.  Hang in there.

Manta

[Bob]

As of this morning she's still Kicking, so that is good... I guess <GRIN> I am getting where I dunno anymore...
but I'll go see her in a bit...
Later all!
...
Bob........

[Jake]

I've been off the forum a few days but I just read where she got pneumonia. sounds like this is an uphill battle the whole way. we'll keep ya'll in our prayers though.


yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory he will reveal to us later       Romans 8-18

[Bob]

Well, My Sister and I went to the hospital and watched mom trying to breath in gasps for about an hour, man that is tough to do !... talked to the doc and he said about all we can do is put her on a resperator, and I said if we do that and in 2 weeks she's no better we can't take her off because its out of our hands and you are in control of it then , Right? its your call and you'll never take her back off the machine, and I don't want her to suffer like this for a year or two ! he said well, say your goodbyes because she is getting very weak !
I said so what else can be done ? he said just tell her you love her cuz it won't be long
... so the Doctor leaves it to me to say put her on the machine and perhaps save her , or perhaps torture her for 5 more years... its a great setup, and I know why they make so much money now, no one faced with that type of desigon would say No ... but me ....
I figure if she can survive it, its up to her, not some doctor and his stupid machine that he will not turn off... ever, if I say he can turn it on ! the whole deal stinks
... and the bad part is it might give her enough time to pull out of it too, but I don't dare say Ok hook her up...because if I say that I can tell them to take it off till I am blue in the face and it will do no good... they are bound by their Oath to try and keep her alive... and rightly so I suppose... but there are no provisions of say ok lets try it for a month, if it don't work then take it off.... that realy bites !
... my sister broke down today and cried on my shoulder, it was exceptionally hard today
but we have done all we can, if she lives or dies now, its all in Gods hands.
.... So I probly Scentenced her to death today , but I know she wouldn't want to live like that... she even told me so... so its the least I can do for her...
... Still... it is even still possible that she could make a complete recovery, because I know how the good lord works some times,<GRIN> some times he takes you to the point of dispare and hopelessness just to show you that his ways are not your ways.
 the human body is an amazeing machine, and I have seen other critters on the verge of death and pull through it... so I know it can happen... but weather it will or not I don't know....
I told Mom today as she woke up for a second or two I told her that "the doctor said it wasn't getting any better...."
 so if she's going to fight this and win she realy has to work at it... or just give up.!
...
...
I can understand now how this can make a very bitter person out of you !...
so I am still learning ....( though, not by choice HAHAHHHA)
....
at the moment she's still Kicking... struggling for each breath...
that has to be the Nastiest torture there is !
...
I can't sit there and watch that for very long... but I outlasted my sister today, bless her hart...  we both know its going to happen one of these days but Man.... why not 20 years from now !?!...but I suppose there is a time and place for everything... and I seriously doubt 20 years from now would be any easier.<GRIN>
...
time will tell I guess.
...
Bob........

[Tink]

Bob,
It sounds like you made the right decision. Who's to know what fate really is now with all these ways to keep people alive. Well wishes to you and yours in the days to come.
Tink

[Bob]

thanks Tink !
 I called my Sister this morning  and beyond all hope Mom's still kicking the Doc said she's doing a little better, not much but a little... and a Little is a long way from where she was yesterday.
...
heheheh amazeing isn't it ?
...I'ed hate to think that Mom is going through all this just to teach me a lesson, that hardly seams fair at all.... but  I have seen things like that before, <GRIN>
....
Bob.......
 

[IronBear]

Bob,
I dont think you sentanced her to death at all. I think you did excatly what needed to be done in the situation you were in.
More good thoughts/prayers/etc...comin your way!

IronBear

[Jake]

I can't say I would have made the decision you did because I'll never know till I'm in that situation but I would like to think I would have done the same thing. I believe you took the best option you had. With a sincere belief in God it makes much more sense to let him have control instead of a doctor. hospitals can and do leave people on machines for years regardless of their families wishes or their suffering. in my opinion they do this not for the benefit of the patient but for money. God will take much better care of your mom than that. either He will heal her or take her but He will do it so that the most good can come from it.

[charley]

Bob,

I'm so sorry that your mom and all of you are having to go through all this pain.  Don't give up though.  Your mom can get better.  Nothing's impossible.  Also if the good lord doesn't have that in the plans he'll take her and she'll be in a better place than she is now.

For what it's worth, I believe I would make the same decision you did if it were my mom.

My thoughts are with you and your family.

Charley

[hg2]

  Bob,

I've been out of the loop for the last few weeks with work and other family activities and just now noticed the thread about your mother.

  My familys hopes and prayers are with your mom,you and your family,the good Lord watches over us all.

                                    hg

[Bob]

Progress Report:
well after the doctor told us she probly wouldn't make the night, Mom Supprized them all and is still hainging in there ! they put a line in to drain the fluid off the lung and she is breathing much much easier, however she is not responsive at all the nurses said, looks like shes sleeping, but I suppose she could be in a coma I dunno.
we didn't even get to see her open her eyes today and all the other times we have, but I told Sis to let her sleep so Sis didn't try to wake her as she usually does...
Personally I think she needs her rest ...
I guess their pumping her full of antibodics  and getting on top of the Pneumonia.
we didn't stay long, but its good to see her breathing easier, so their doing something right
....
thanks for the help guys, she needs all the help she can get right now !
...
Bob.......

 

[Bob]

Well, All kinds of problems came to rest today, Mom is doing worse, so bad the wife came home in tears from seeing her this morning, I got a Trafic ticket in the mail from a robot camara, showing me blatently running a red light ( there was no one else there but I did run the light!)  letter of the law though now days guys! yes it calculates speed yes it takes your picture yes its all done in Arazona and mailed to you !... so from now on if you exceed the speed limit by 1mph your going to get a fine in the mail! isn't that so nice of them !
 My wife saw the bankruptcy lawyer this morning and he said if Mom dies the bankruptcy court will take the inheritance away from me , sell it to pay the debt.
 that will be the way its done and there is nothing I can do about it...
i figured they would just call the bankrupcy void and make me pay it, but no.. they will take the property away from me and sell it instead. 
 needless to say its been a great morning !
 I called Sis and the one doctor wants to take mom off the tubes completely and let her die
when before the pneumonia set in she was doing really good and recovering....
...
 My wifes brother still isn't on Chemo theoripy and he should have been now for 2 months because the insurance people are still "Investigating it" !  and she is hopping mad thinking that she's going to loose her brother due to the insurance co. (military i think) is dragging their feet!....
...
when it rains it pours I guess !
...
only good thing I have to report is that I got the truck UN-stuck from the snow bank...
still land locked on the patch of dry ground and can't get it out... but its not STUCK !
....
some days it just doesn't pay to get out of bed !
@#&^#$%#(@&
hehehehehe
oh well so what else is new !
...
Bob.......

[Bob]

Well, I called my Sister tonight and she reports than Mom passed away at 3:00pm today
so at least she is not suffering anymore.
everyone has to go at some time, so I suppose now is as good as any.
 I want to thank all of you for your Well wishes ,prayers and support that has meant allot to us !  I am sure she is in a better place now. I will miss her dearly, and it won't be the same at all without her, but life carries on... thats just how it goes sometimes.
...
thank you !
Bob......


 

[hg2]

  Bob,

  I'm so sorry to hear your mother had passed.My condolences to you and your family for your loss.

                                                        Rusty

[Tink]

Bob,
I lost my dad this past November. He went into the hospital and 6 days later he was gone. I know the feeling of loss you must be experiencing. I wish you and yours the best and you have my deepest sympathys.
Tink

[hydrotinkerer]

I am very sorry to hear that Bob. My condolences to all involved.

                                                       Fred

[ROADKING]

Bob,
Sorry for your loss, may God be with you and your family and Friends.



                      Billy

[crb]

Bob,  Sorry to hear about your mom.  Know what you are going through.

crb

[randy]

Bob and family;
Sorry for your loss, seems that all we can do is take these lumps as life delivers them, Lord knows I've had my share, as we all will, just doesn't seem fair but that's the way it is. My deepest condolences to you and yours.
Randy

[Painless]

I'm sorry to hear about your loss, Bob.  Time heals most things but faith in God can heal them all.

Russ.

[numberonekiwi]

Bob , Sorry to hear about your Mum

[Jake]

I'm sorry to hear this Bob.

I remember in 1 corinthians it says our physical bodies can't inherit what will last forever and dying bodies can't inherit the Kingdom of God but we WILL be given bodies that will never die. it also says    death, where is your victory?  death, where is your sting?

(its the last part of chapter 15)

I believe it says this to let us know that when we die there will be no need for the sadness and anguish that follows the death of a nonbeliever. they are gone forever but your mom is not. You'll see her again someday. till then she's in a better place, feeling better, and doing better than the rest of us. My prayers are still with you and your family and I know God will help you through this

[charley]

I"m sorry Bob.

I hope the big guy gives your family and you the strength to get through things.

Charley

[Bob]

My Sincear thanks to all of you!
 Sis took care of the $2000. at the furenerl joint.... what a crock of crap those people are!
come at you in the guize of sincear hart felt sorrow for your loss, but How about a real big Furneral sirvice, we can provide morners if needed for just a small extra charge and about then is when I stopped her looked her in the eyes and said as cheep as possable absoultly no frills and no service and if I get any more BS like that I'm walking out the door...
so she turned to my sister and gave Her her spiel ! ... I realy am proud of my self I lasted 30 minutes before I said this is worse than a lawyers office ! what the heck are we here for?
if you need me to sign anything I sujest you get with it because I'm not staying much longer
and she started again with the same BS so I got up and walked out my sis telling me But Robert she needs your signiture on 2 things is all I turned back and said what ? give it to me and explain what it is and I MIGHT sign it....
One was a release so they could move her body, they already did that, so I figured there was no harm in signing that <GRIN> the other was that they were going to cremate her and then give her ashes to us... I said how much , she said well we'll get to that!, I said
you want me to sign this paper that says you can do it regardless the cost ? think again lady!  she said no that is just so we can be allowed by the state to preform what ever you guys deside on. so I signed it because the cost thing was to come later...! and a quick scan told me it was no money involved except for a $12.00 permit to move the body ! which they already paid.  she said ok you can go, there is just some minor details I need to clear up with your sister, so I left and set in the car for another 45 minutes...
when sis came out she said thank you Robert its all taken care of I said ok how much she said $2000.  I said for cremation ? she said yes, I put it on my credit card , I said why on earth did you do that Mom has insurance for that didn't she ? she said Yes but they want it paid in full FIRST,...so when the insurance pays, sis SHOULD be reimburced!
.... I suppose it was a very fortunite thing that my sis was there, because after what I hurd I would not have given them one red cent!....
ofcorse if the insurance doesn't pay  ( which is par for the course for insurance companies) I will have to find some way to pay my sister half of that !<GRIN>
....
boy the vultures were realy curcling at that place ... But after I told them about the 3rd time that we don't have the money for a fancy furneral she finally moved on to other things
but by then I was so agitated, I could have strangled her and her assistant with one hand....at the same time ! AURGH !!
.... according to the will My sister showed me thats what Mom wanted... that was news to me because I thought she wanted burried !
anyway.... other than the jerks at the furneral joint trying to take the very socks off my feet ! it wasn't too bad... Sis has accepted it and so have I and that even made joking around about it funny... I may have to go back to that place to pick up the ashes...
if I do, I will not bend over while I'm there  I tell you !...if I drop my pin while signing the Release of the ASHES.... I'll kick it to the car !<GRIN>
...
so 3 cheers for my Sis ! she did what I couldn't do ! ...
  So what'da ya know Sis is good for something HAHAHHAHHA
...
sorry guys, but you never hear what happens after some one kicks the bucket, its alwayse just up to that point......
well take it from me if I hadn't insisted on it being as cheep as all possable it would have been $5000 easy...
asking questions like will you alow us to comb her hair and make her presentable ?at no charge to you ... I bursted out and said" is this before you burn her or afterwords?"....
 "like its going to matter even the slightest bit?"...
...My paitiance was getting very thin about that time ! ... and she cept trying to talk mainly to my sister LOL ! I can't amagon why ! I felt like reaching down her throat and pulling her hart out for attempting to FLEASE my sister and I.... whats worse she succedded
because creamation is supposed to be something like $500... but that is what I get for not staying there, but I had to leave ... or I would have gotten mad ...
( no I wasn't yet!   HAHAHA, just irritated!)
....
takes all kinds to make the weird world we live in!
...
anyway... as I said before at least she's not suffering anymore, and I'm sure where she's at now is a far better place than where she was !
...
....
anyway...

I thank you All for your support and all that good stuff... Much Appreciated!
...
I know it sounds like I'm more concerned about "MONEY" than my Mother, but My mother is gone and there is nothing I can do to bring her back, so now its survival...
 no sense in letting these vultures take what little we don't have to begin with.
AND they WILL take everything if you let them !

Bob.....
 

[scratch1676]

Bob, I haven't been on the site in a bit.  I have had to catch up, seems everything hits at once.  I see your situation has been far worse than mine and I am pulling for you and your family to weather the storm, I know you will.  Still getting set to make the pwm.  thats all for now.

[Manta]

Bob,

just read about it.

My heartfelt condolences to you and your family.  This comes to all of us;  but that doesn't make it any easier.

Manta

[wess]

So sorry to hear about your Mom's passing. I pray God will strengthen you & your family during this sad time. I am sorry that you had to find out the hard way about the vultures that wait for all of us. They truely are vultures & could care less about people. They just sit on their purches waiting to swoop down & take advantage of the situation, all the time making you believe they really care. The only thing they care about is money. As you can tell I've had dealings with those people myself. My heart goes out to you Bob.......Wes

[b1jetmech]

Bob, I just don't know what to say in a time like this but the Lord is looking out for you, and my prayers go to you and your family.

Were all praying for you.

Chase

 

[Bob]

Well, things have calmed down a bit now, and after thinking about it, Mom's passing was probably easier this way than other ways... still not something I would have chose, and I suppose thats why I had no real control over it <GRIN>
....
I have been down to see my Sis who is staying at Mom's old place for a week or so trying to get stuff in order.... Thank God for Sisters! she has really helped a bunch in this, which in all truthfulness, I didn't expect, I figured she'ed fall all to peaces every day...
....
Now we get to see what "Probate" says and what My "bankruptcy court" says,  I have no idea what will transpire, and I am not looking forward to talking to them at all, but it needs to be done.
 I have no doubt in my Mind that the state of California will want a Piece of the "PIE" and will get it one way or another, regardless of what I want.
....
so right now we are in "LIMBO" I don't want to move down to the Ranch untill I am sure I can
and will be able to stay there, but the place needs someone there or things will dissapeer quickly... so I plan on going down there after sis leaves, or I take her home.(which I have offered to do)
Sis and I both were Ill prepared for this, as we expected Mom to last another 20 years,(that Indian blood in her, if given a chance would have let her make it to 95 yrs old easy) hehehe
but I guess it was not supposed to be that way.
...
I think I will Load Up some of my stuff and move my butt down there untill we know what is going to happen, it will give me a chance to do some much needed repairs on the place
and my presence will keep the Looters away.
...
if this situation works out the way I hope it will, it will be great, much better for Us indeed, no question about that, but with the Bankruptcy court involved and No LEGAL will...
chances are it will be rather nasty fighting with the state, trying to keep as much as I can!
....
 the NOT knowing.. is really the worst part.... now . I can't do nothing till I know whats going on and no one has said a thing to either of us yet.
...
I'll go down and See Sis tomorrow and see whats up....and what news she has,
and sense its a holiday I can't do any checking on stuff with the lawyer, or Probate...
(what ever that is!HAHAHAH) so all that will have to wait till Tuesday!
...if anyone has any suggestions on what to check on , I'ed surely appreciate the help.
...
Bob........

[Bob]

Well I contacted the Bankruptcy lawyer and informed them of my Mom's passing and that I would probably get some sort of "Inheratance" ( the law says I have to do that!)
 so I have no idea what will happen about that, I did tell the secratery that I would sooner give up my place here than loose my inheratance if it comes to that and she understood that
so she would tell the Lawyer what I said.
....
 I also found out that it is up to ME to contact Probate in the county courthouse about the will and they will tell me what needs done. and that a hand written will that has been signed is legal or a typed will that is signed and WHitnessed by 2 signitures is legal.
we have only one whitness signiture, however she said there probly won't be any problems if the will is not contested. which is a relief... but some how I'll believe it when I see it ! <GRIN>
...
in the morning my Sis and I go to get Mom's car taken care of the bill now is at over $1500.00 and we cannot get it out because neither one of us are "Fitzwaters"(Mom Re married 20 years ago and cept the name after Ken's death) so the car is in Dorothy Fitzwater's name and they cannot release it to us.
after spending all day on the phone Sis finally found out that if we take the will to the car towing place they will make a photo copy of it and let us take the car...
Sis talked to the Owner of the place and got the price reduced to $675.00 if we do it tomorrow!... which we will.
...they'll just tow it to mom's place and drop it off!
...
so although Sis found 2 insurance policies Mom had, one was for $10,000 and the other is unknown as of yet, (tomorrow should tell us)  chances are that it will be months before they get around to paying up. till then Sis's one card will be way over limit I think !
...
so the Saga continues...
...
Bob........

[Bob]

Ok ! One Problem SOLVED ! we got the Wrecked car out of the towing companies grasp FINALLY!
My Sis did indeed get the price reduced from $1500.00 to $675.00...
she had to take in the Will and her drivers liscnses which they made mutable coppies of both
and the guy remarked " Man, Dad only charged $75.00 for towing it out to your place?"
...( all the rest of the towing companies My sister called would do it for $50.00 or less)
... but anyway the car is at the Ranch, after I took Sis to dinner it was parked on a hill on the property near the house , I got in and hit the starter after lifting the hood and checking stuff and it fired right up.... but when I put it in gear it made what sounded like a transmition stripping gears !  or trying to go into gear and not doing so... so I put it back in park and killed it.... it runs, thats what I needed to know.
the right front is dammaged is all looks like about a 20mph impact not real bad at all headlight fender, hood ,grill and bumper, frame is bent that holds the right front wheel, its out of place a bit... but setting on all 4 wheels , left front fender is bent badly as well where they ripped the door open to get Mom out... windshield is cracked from Her head impact on the right side... dunno how she got way over there ! she had to be like a rag doll in that car, she alwayse had her seat belt on so its a mistery to me !
....
anyway I can use it fer something, dunno what... maybe a water pump or something ! if I don't fix it !...and Yes I can fix it... its not that bad , but I don't need it so why spend the money on it!
...
My sis don't want it, she will fix the old Mercadies (trans problems on it!) which is good news to me , gets it out of the yard ! HAHAHAHHAHAHA
and will give Sis realy good reliable transportation for years to come!
...
So it looks as if I'll move into Mom's place and take over down there....
although the place needs Much work it is free and clear.... and that means a great deal in this world !
over 50% of my stuff is moved down there allready, so all I have to do is finish moving!
then sell this place....
sounds like a plan to me  and should work great !
but we shall see what happens !
....
Friday we pick up Mom's ashes and death cert. (which we have to have)...
My sister wants to get a Lawyer for the Inheratance bit and Probate but I seriously doubt we will need one now. if we do we'll get one... but I want to talk to them at the probate office first... it realy shouldn't be any truble but you know how the county court house is!
...we shall see
...
Bob.......

[IronBear]

Bob, Sorry to hear about your Mom.
It's an inevitablility that no one can escape, but that doesnt make it hurt any less or fill the space left by that person.

Hope your family heals quickly

IronBear

[Bob]

Thank you
Much appreciated!
...
Bob.....

[Cowboy]

Hey Bob,
 
  It's been a while since I've been on, but I just got caught up on this.  I'm sorry to hear about your loss.  My condolences to you and yours.  Losing people that are important to us is never easy, but I've found it good to remember the things that made them important instead of dwelling on how they went.  Prayers be with you.

-Cowboy

[Bob]

Thanks Cowboy !
...
 Today actually may have been a very good day indeed for us.... I took my Sis to the lawyer she wanted to see ans He said that the Bankruptcy thing should be long gone before my inheiratance is "Official" so that should be a extreamily good thing !
they will trow out the Will because its only got 1 signiture on it and not legal, and sense Probate will devide it 50/50 and that is what the will said to do anyway...whats the point?
its easier ,cheeper and a bunch faster to do it without the will , he said, and I'm all for easier and cheeper....
  However I asked him about his Fee and he wants 4% of the value of the estate...so if its valued at 100k he gets $4000.00 if its 200k he gets $8000.00 ... and I said to my Sis How are you going to pay that? are you realy sure you want to do this and she said definately ! YES......so looks like someone is getting a piece of the "Pie" after all ! <GRIN>
I ment to ask him about the inharatance tax and what that means to us, I'll call him tomorrow and ask... more than likely he'll have something to tell us about that aspect of it too!
...
He did say for me to move in and take care of the place !, and that was a concern of mine
so now that I have the OK I am definately moveing !
....
which to me is GREAT ! its what I want anyway !
...
so... not so bad all in all !
a hefty bill sis made but thats her choice, I'll help where I can !
...life insurance should take care of that !
...
Bob.......

[Bob]

Well, I shuttled My Sis around town today, spent 5 hrs doing that ! man that gal can "shop till she drops!" HAHAHAHAHA
Got lunch out'a the deal and  enjoyied her company, and we BS'ed about everything in general
almost like the years between the last time we did such never exhisted.
seams now like all that is left to do is wait on "Paperwork", life insurance, car insurance
and Probate....
I will probably head down there again in the morning and take my chainsaw with me again and start getting some trail cut around the place for the comeing fire season.
I broke the tractor the last time I had it going, I put the bucket down and it won't come back up !... looks like it sheered a key in the shaft and the pump isn't turning on the hydrolic pump, so my top priority tomorrow is to get the tractor going first, I'll have to pull the pump off the front of the tractor and see just what happened to it....
I took 2 cats down there to the Ranch and I got to see them today, they came right up to me and wanted pets, hehehehe I guess all is forgiven for putting them in the Laundry basket/cat carrier !  HAHAHAHAHA so their still Kickin' and looking healthy, if they ever start hunting mice and rats they will realy LOVE it there !.
...
I caught myself thinking Mom was in the house, like usual a few times, today...I suppose it will take a long time to get used to the fact that she is gone. I suppose thats Natural as Old habbits die hard <GRIN> but I sure do miss that O'l gal.... I guess it just wouldn't be right if I didn't !
....
 After looking at that place , I have so darn much work to do I don't know where to start
(Typical Ranch life!) I guess its one of those "Do one thing a day " type things or it will never get done!...
top priority on my list of things to do is rebuild the spring... that will take months of hard work, but needs to be done very soon, as its the drinking water supply, and its not looking very sanatary any more.
...
there is a great advantage to going back Home to settle in again, as I know where the water lines are laid, where the electrical lines are, and where the soft spots in the field are at ! Oddly enough allot of the stuff is still in the same place <Grin>
...
I think my major concern should be removeing the fire danger stuff as the brush and debree has over grown all the paths,roads and cleared areas that used to give the place some protection form fires from all directions, now there is only one direction that looks half way clear, the rest are very brushy !... the water can wait till spring,  late spring and summer I won't be able to operate the motors out in the brush for fear of starting a fire myself, so best get with that major undertakeing as soon as possable.
...if any of you know where I can buy "personal ENERGY" from I'ed sure appreaciate a hint or two... I havn't got enough get up and go for all this work coming up! HAHAHHAHAHA
I could use about 50 gallons of High grade "Get up and go!" HAHAHAHAHA
...
....
My Sis had the car towed in for repair and the Repair place sent the insurance co. an estimate, of over $3000.00 in repair costs, not counting any mechanical problems,
so we are waiting on word from them on what they want to do... I think its totaled
... but who knows what they will do !
....
well, as they say, "thats the way it goes !...first ur money then your clothes !"
...
My Sis said I need a "Butt-Shield"... and I got thinking a stainless steel Butt-shield probly would be a good device to have with this socioty... but you probly have to have a PERMIT to ware one! HAHAHAHAHHAHA
...
Bob.......

[Bob]

Well finally , we got the car out of halk ... I had to go to the DMV and get the car redgistration changed into my name and then a Non opperation cert on it is the only way they would not keep dunning me for liscnses on the totaled car... sense we cept the car and did not GIVE it to a wrecking yard the people at the DMV didn't know how to handle it! but finally the gal got the boss to come over and tell her how to handle it !<GRIN>
instead of costing $17.00 it cost me $35.00... and they were going to make us come back but my Sis had the death cert in her purse as well as the accident report... so at least its now taken care of and I don't have to worry about the car any more !
.... the life insurance is being held up because My sis has to have a copy of her marrage liscnses from lewiseana... and their back logged because of the modigraw er what ever it is!
... I am thinking I will get the info from Sis and see if I can get my part comeing so I don't have to wait!....I havn't desided on that yet.
...
but so far the Car insurance seams to have been a large JOKE... full coverage on the car and they will send a check for 600 or 700 bucks ... minus the 2 $100 dollar tow bills that they were supposed to pay for to get the estimates done...  and we're supposed to replace the car with that much ?  who's idea is that ?...
 All my life I've known that car insurance is a "SCAM" and this definately conferms it!
they have only paid a pitance of the hospital bill that is over $200.000  for 2 weeks in ICU
yet she had GOOD insurance ( state farm)...
and yet with all that ... car insurance is MANDANTORY ? why ? to make the insurance company rich ? because it sure don't help the victoms!
... no doubt about it we live in a weird socioty!
...
Bob.......